-The Rose Letters-
Happy New Year Readers! - A smile is the most attractive thing you can wear
The Year of the Rat for those who follow the Chinese zodiac signs
Trust your year is starting with excitement, curiosity, and courage. Hope you left “that” in 2019 and ready for newness, possibilities, opportunities, sharing, and love. Which is a good segue into my topic.
I share a lot about romantic relationships but we must set boundaries for all relationships. Lovers, spouses, children, friends, parents, coworkers, and yes bosses too! Boundaries are hard, but necessary for healthy relationships. We must let folks know with diplomacy and tact what we want from the relationship and are willing to put up with and NOT! Sometimes we are so fearful of losing that man/woman or job that we allow people to walk over us and take us for granted. We eventually do speak up but then it can across as angry, ultimatums, or “you trying to change me”.
I find by letting a man know of my boundaries and expectations early during our first few conversations, it helps us to decide if we want to continue seeing each other. Of course, our feelings my change (yes, that has happened), as a result, our expectations and boundaries may change too. But we must continue to communicate our boundaries and be prepare if they bounce or you may leave because they/you aren’t feeling the relationship anymore.
When it comes to bosses and your job/career, it may not be easy, but it can be simple to state your expectations and ask them of theirs too. But with tact, tact, and more tact. If your boundaries and expectations are not being met, it may be time for you to look for another employment that values you!
Make sure you check-in with yourself, before you approach any conversations. Is it a boundary or are you trying to make the other person change? Remember that you can only control yourself!
Here are the take-a -ways and the link to read the details.
The Year of the Rat for those who follow the Chinese zodiac signs
Trust your year is starting with excitement, curiosity, and courage. Hope you left “that” in 2019 and ready for newness, possibilities, opportunities, sharing, and love. Which is a good segue into my topic.
I share a lot about romantic relationships but we must set boundaries for all relationships. Lovers, spouses, children, friends, parents, coworkers, and yes bosses too! Boundaries are hard, but necessary for healthy relationships. We must let folks know with diplomacy and tact what we want from the relationship and are willing to put up with and NOT! Sometimes we are so fearful of losing that man/woman or job that we allow people to walk over us and take us for granted. We eventually do speak up but then it can across as angry, ultimatums, or “you trying to change me”.
I find by letting a man know of my boundaries and expectations early during our first few conversations, it helps us to decide if we want to continue seeing each other. Of course, our feelings my change (yes, that has happened), as a result, our expectations and boundaries may change too. But we must continue to communicate our boundaries and be prepare if they bounce or you may leave because they/you aren’t feeling the relationship anymore.
When it comes to bosses and your job/career, it may not be easy, but it can be simple to state your expectations and ask them of theirs too. But with tact, tact, and more tact. If your boundaries and expectations are not being met, it may be time for you to look for another employment that values you!
Make sure you check-in with yourself, before you approach any conversations. Is it a boundary or are you trying to make the other person change? Remember that you can only control yourself!
Here are the take-a -ways and the link to read the details.
v Don’t just react - You cannot choose your
feelings, but you can choose how you react
to those feelings.
v Be positive in setting your boundaries -
Approach the conversation to set a boundary or discussion with unconditional
positive regard.
v State your feeling or boundary simply - You
are simply stating that this is what you need and want in the relationship.
v Acknowledge that it isn’t up for negotiation
- And that it is what you need from them.
In the
meantime, Keep it Real!
Toni Counts Rose
tonirose12@sbcglobal.net
